Runs. Two hundred and eighty three of them to be precise as the Pelicans cantered to victory over Ley Hill.

Pelican batsmen have played second fiddle to bowlers for much of the season, so the Skipper elected to spice things up a bit by opting to have first hit on what looked a decent deck at Ley Hill.

The plan was for Asad and Kunaal to go into battle at the top of the order for batting average supremacy, but Kunaal (and his driver, Rags) turned up 25 minutes late so it was left to Tony to join Asad at the crease.

It’s fair to say the Ley Hill openers were not the strongest attack we’ve faced this season, but the ball still needed hitting. Asad and Tony did exactly that and laid solid foundations.

Tony showed a liking for the leg side and plonked a couple of sixes into the trees to up the run rate. What he did not show a liking for was the cut shot. Play and miss was followed by a carefully rehearsed practice shot. Which was duly followed by another play and miss. At about the 10th time of asking, Tony got bat on ball to a cut shot, and feathered an edge to to keeper.

Tony is going white-water rafting in Colorado this week. You get the feeling he may use the paddle as a bat and be wafting outside off stump as his fellow sailors yell at hm that we’re going over a waterfall and it might be better to paddle than practice the cut shot.

Bails strode out at No. 3 and the scene was set for some lusty hitting. Bails eased his way into the teens and looked good, only to somehow miss the biggest long hop that has been bowled this season. Pelicans on the sidelines were unable to offer any sympathy, as they were doubled over in hysterics as Bails trudged back to the pavilion.

And now the average battle began as Kunaal joined Asad at the crease. It’s fair to say running is not high on Asad’s priority list so this developed into a battle of the boundary hitters.

Asad powered towards three figures, but with a ton in sight he scooped one in the air and fell for an excellent 90.

The Skipper came and went all too quickly, although he’s unlikely to often talk about being bowled by a 13-year-old with a somewhat suspect action.

Tea was on the horizon so Kunaal went into full on beast mode, meaning cars parked roughly half a mile away were in danger of picking up a dent or two.

Lofted drives, huge heaves and even the ramp shot (Toobes, as he told us, does not have that in his locker) were unleashed as he brought up a quite brilliant century.

After taking tea, the Pelicans were in need of inspiration. That was provided by the sight of wild ginger himself. Ticks came armed with a family car, child and a horror story about heart surgery. Eight weeks post-op and he could probably still bowl faster than Toobes, but he elected for a lap of the outfield. 2017, Ticks. 2017.

Ley Hill needed something in the region of nine an over. They opened their charge at a shade under two an over as Toobes and Josh kept it neat and tidy.

In the home fixture against Ley Hill, Kunaal broke a bail. Josh felt it only right to trump that as a beauty beat the defences of a Ley Hill batsmen and duly broke both a bail and a stump.

Toobes doesn’t quite possess the pace to break stumps, but he wanted to get in on the breaking game. So with this thought in mind while stood at third slip, he took the decision to launch himself at Asad stood at second slip. A ball flew towards Asad (the ball was above Asad’s head) so Toobes thought he was well within his rights to launch himself at his team-mate and smash him in the face. With Asad on the deck and Toobes peering quizically down at him, the ball dropped to the ground and to rub salt into wounds, a run was taken.

So yes, it is now the 10th straight season that Toobes has injured a team-mate on the field of play.

Back to the action and the Pelicans continued to chip away, with Adam and James Walters helping themselves to wickets. But they were eclipsed by Rags who tightened his grip on the bowling award with another three wickets as the Pelicans raced to a 170-run victory.

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Reports are intended to convey an entertaining picture of the day’s play. No disrespect is meant, but if on occasion we misjudge matters, please take it in the friendly and humorous spirit in which it is intended.