And here is Sunday’s match report from our Kiwi superstar. It’s quite possible the power has gone to his head:

Dear Diary. 31 July 2016 at Hyde Heath

Today I think I know how Prince Charles feels. Today, diary, I got the chance to captain the Pelis, and if this is how HRH feels every day I understand his anguish, an anguish tempered by excitement of things to come.

Greatness is something that is thrust upon one and so it was that Alex passed me the lucky 10p coin to take and seek out the opposition captain in order to see if wielded willow or created thunderbolts of leather. Was this surprise decision to see how one would cope?

Success! The first hurdle hurdled and my first decision was to bowl. You may say that this is no different to other Sunday’s but I am well aware that change needs to be gradual. This is transition not regicide after all.

We started with 10, young Arif unable to locate the ground in good time. What are they teaching in geography classes these days? In his absence I took the second over, following on from a tidy start by Josh.

Match prep of hotdogs and a pint of brown isn’t exactly ideal and the subsequent over went for a dozen.

A few overs in Josh got one, I also and with a bowling change Jamie bowled a peach to remove the Hyde Heath keeper, a useful left hander.

45-4 or thereabouts the Heath’s number 5 unleashed some onside mayhem. Opportunity for one to make a mark, provide a point of difference to the incumbent. 4 fielders on the onside boundary, a Pelis first and will be described in Wisden as the Carter Leg Theory. Like with many theories it didn’t work (the Tim Peake caused Brexit theory is still a work in progress).

With wickets falling at the other end we were staring down the barrel of a run chase in the vicinity of 90. Last week 86 proved to be a challenging score but Hyde Heath’s wicket was not in the same league as the Meadow’s track, by track I mean wagon ruts and hoof marks.

Some bowling changes had Adam and Greg wheeling away. Adam picking up 3 good scalps including one caught in magnificently absurd fashion by Hasan.

Greg sent down 5 overs for a return of 1 for 9. One fellow Peli whose name sounds like Paris suggested it was a mirror image of his batting but with less maidens.

All out for 135. Bailey 3 for 16, Fairweather 3 for 43, Jamie 2 for 37, Greg 1 for 9 and HRH 1 for 25. Some good catching as well, Josh now on track for the Catching Award, pity he wasn’t in Downing Street doing this as he’d now be nominated to be Marquis of Wendover.

Half hour before tea meant we had a few overs to bat. Nicholls and Asad to open.

I discovered over the course of the 26 overs we bowled that leadership is a lonely business, as lonely as Clive’s bat is in it’s relationship with the ball.

The left arm opener bowled a beaut, Clive missed it and as decisions go it wouldn’t make it on to the practice exam for the Level 1 umpiring course (which I have done you know, can show you the certificate and everything). Pitched middle and off and moved enough that it would have taken middle. Enough said.

Hasan padded up while Alex and Asad got things ticking along. Dropped on zero, Alex moved things along with some good sensible batting. Asad seemed to think that upsetting his elders with laconic batting and running was acceptable. The lob to mid wicket off a huge full toss was a suitably Pelican type way to bring up a fifty.

From there the boundaries flowed and a missed stumping was one highlight in the procession. Josh was given a bit of stick when it was suggested he had given Asad out without the wicket being broken, as the other umpire I knew he was signalling one to go in the over. Not one for the ever growing list of nominations for the Balls Up Award.

A win by 9 wickets.

Early doors for a pint of brown before the progress back to the Cross Keys.

A match that rewarded hard working decent cricketers.

But diary, despite the fine win is this the start of something new at the Pelis?

The ‘Kiwification’ of the Pelis? The end of the reign from Boyzone Country (I think that’s what they call it, accent quite tricky so hard to catch everything that’s said)?

I think the first thing I would do is change my regnal name, Boss or Chief, Skip has been done before.

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Reports are intended to convey an entertaining picture of the day’s play. No disrespect is meant, but if on occasion we misjudge matters, please take it in the friendly and humorous spirit in which it is intended.